WORD FOR THE WEEK – UNFAITHFULNESS
Unfaithfulness is defined by the free dictionary as “Not adhering to promises, obligations, or allegiances; or Breaking trust in a marriage or relationship by having sexual relations with someone other than one’s spouse or sexual partner.”
The Normalization Of Unfaithfulness
The last couple of months have seen continuous disclosure of the breakdown of different celebrity marriages. The first sign or final stroke is almost always related to infidelity by one of the spouses.
As disturbing as this trend is, even just if not more disturbing is the response of the general populace to such news. I keep hearing people justify a man cheating on his wife cos she is too busy, she got fat, she is proud, she doesn’t look sexy, she isn’t even beautiful, she looks frigid, she is probably cheating too, karma is catching up with her, and finally, she probably or definitely had it coming.
It is even harder to believe that it is more common for women to go about wishing ill on other women for no justifiable reason. I keep seeing posts and tweets by “Christians” supporting the “other woman” and then go to their own church to pray against the power and influence of any “other woman” in their own marriages. I see ladies talk about their admiration for the “mistress” and how she is more beautiful, fun-loving, and happier than the wife in question, and then use their next breath to talk about how their own husband dare not try such, else hell would be let loose.
As a guy, you pray your sister has a happy home but encourage your friend to cheat on his wife. You would go crazy if another man hugs your wife but listen with rapt attention when your married colleague brags about his tryst with the new interns. You say you “bro before hoes” when you lie to your friend’s wife while he hooks up with his mistress. A friend tells you his marriage his going through hard times and your advice is for him to get himself a mistress to help calm his nerves.
Every marriage has its peculiarities, its sweet and sour points, its ups and downs, but more importantly, it is fixable. People are quick to share their “fun times” on social media, they appreciate the “likes and comments”. It makes some happy and validates others, so also some people share their “down moments” on social media too.
Some seek empathy, others advice and some just want to vent. It is morally wrong to support evil, just as it is also wrong to mock someone who is hurt, especially if it is a situation they couldn’t prevent. Irrespective of your grouse and difference or dislike for someone, your views should first of all be objective, just as importantly, it should be constructive and sympathetic.
Remember, if you have nothing good to say, say nothing at all. But if you happen to have something good to say but either the timing or method of delivery is wrong, there is no harm in keeping quiet.