The Coven (Deputy Girlfriend)
When exactly did a meeting of women become synonymous with a witch coven? It sounds funny to some, but some of us find it disrespectful.
The way feminists are now called coven members is a blatant example of this.
I digress. As soon as I was done with my Landlord and Landlady, I dashed for my room.
I needed to get the room in shape for the arrival of Hannah. Before that, I need to find a solution to the Tomi question.
Where can I send her to? I think she has a few friends around her former house. She can go say hello to them.
It might cost me her transport fare and some cash for snacks, but those few hours alone with Hannah is a worthy return on investment.
As I got within the gate, I could see Mama Nonso making her way out of the compound. She stopped me and wanted to start a conversation.
Do I look like one of her coven members that she gossips with? Why is the woman making herself a tool in the hand of the devil this Sunday?
I thought her church use to close by 2 PM or 4 PM. Why can’t she go and meet her friend, Mama Tosin, so they can continue their chitchatting?
Mama Nonso, feigning the most innocent of smiles asked me, “Uncle Andy, what of that your Madam?”
First of all, when did this woman start calling me Uncle Andy? All the years I’ve lived here, she has not only called me by my first name, but she has also insisted I added Ma, whenever I addressed her.
A lady who is less than five years older than me. Her only edge over me is that she married at an early age and has four kids already. If not for being neighbors, what business do we have in common?
Secondly, Mama Nonso has never cared about Hannah. She looks down at her so much that she often won’t respond to her greetings.
Hannah has even stopped greeting her. This is the same Hannah that I complain is over tolerant of people’s excesses.
I told Mama Nonso that I don’t know where Hannah is and tried excusing myself. Instead, she blocked me and began telling me to value what I have.
She was about to sermonize me on how men misbehave and lose a special someone, simply because they get a newer someone.
I had to cut her off before she got too far. I told her that I am currently in a hurry and she looks dressed to go out.
With a promise that I would be available to listen to her whenever she gets back, I excused myself.
I have very little time left. That room would not get itself back in order. It seems some witches in a coven are really working overtime to ensure I am not adequately prepared for Hannah’s arrival.
Of all days for Mama Nonso to try her hypocritical neighborliness at me, did it have to be today?
I got to my room and was shocked to meet the door open behind the mosquito net.
Dashing into the room, I halted in my track. Seated on the sofa, eating from two plates of steaming rice, there were Tomi and Hannah.
These witches have succeeded. The Coven have had their way. How in the world did Tomi and Hannah get home before me?
Why do they look content? Who cooked? Why are they eating together?
My enemies have finally gotten me.